Renowrites blog!

Author of YA novel "Enlightenment" available March 2019!

Self actualization

I’ve been thinking a lot about purpose. As I get older, I’m in a state of wonder at life’s journey.

I’m the son of Filipino immigrants who worked diligently to provide a good life in the States for me and my sister, JoAnna. We had a nice house and nothing to complain about.

However, there was a lingering feeling of something missing that was hard to pinpoint. I consider the days of my youth lonely times, the loneliness slowly burning a hole inside me. I played basketball and baseball which helped me not dwell on this loneliness. Sports was my great escape.

Books and music were my other outlets to combat loneliness. And when I started to write in high school, my haphazard stories became the impetus for me become a published writer. This was a dream I didn’t share with anyone. At the time, I thought my family wouldn’t take it seriously.

The last nineteen years, I’ve been privileged to be a husband and father. My kids have a good life in Northern California. Now they are teenagers and on their way towards adulthood.

When they were babies, I was resolved to keep a roof over their heads and not be homeless. As strange as that may sound, that was my fear — being a homeless family. That’s what drove me to go to work everyday.

Now that they are older, I have a sense everything will be okay. The fear still resonates at times, but I’m a in different place. I think less of homelessness and more about my life’s journey, my overall purpose to mankind.

My eldest daughter, a smart beautiful eighteen year old who I enjoy talking to about life’s philosophical questions, reminded me in a recent car conversation that this is self actualization, the final stage of development in Abraham Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. This stage occurs when a person is able to take full advantage of their talents while still being mindful of their limitations. In other words, its the desire to be most you can be after the most basic needs like shelter, a sense of belonging and esteem are met.

Self actualization. I realize I’ve been working all my life to get to this stage. My lonely days in my youth, to finding a sense of belonging in college, to building my reputation in music and writing, to taking care of my family. All of these needs have been met.

Now when I attempt to hit my daily minimum word count while balancing my day job and family life, writing serves as a mechanism for me to reach my potential, to test my limits, and to tell a story worth remembering.

And realizing I’m self-actualizing should make me feel blessed. Perhaps I’ll feel that way one day when all the books of The Bathala Series are written.

But I’m here. I’m writing. I’m in self actualization. And I’m hoping to enjoy the details of this journey, to breathe it all in, instead of always focusing on the destination.

Filed under: everyday, Writing,

Family website

My wife and I have decided to start a family website. The URL was just purchased over the weekend and I consider this the most important website in my life.

We think of it as a time capsule for our kids, family, friends and future generations of kids, family and friends to understand what life was like for our family during this historic time. I’m in the midst of putting this all together, but ultimately, it will have photos, videos and of course, blogs. Most importantly, it gives my kids a chance to test out their creativity and grow their online acumen.

In my mind, we have been at a new industrial revolution since the turn of this century; it’s an online revolution where computer knowledge is required for anyone to use for their benefit, or for those un-narcissitic folks, for the benefit of society. I know this isn’t an original idea; many family website exist out there. But it’s a big step for us California Ursals. We like to keep things private.

So we are going to come out of our shell. It’s now my children’s turn to tell their stories. Hopefully, this family website will be one of the keys to opening the doors to their dreams and aspirations. It’s something I hope they can pass on to their children, and future generations to come, so that my family will always remember their origins.

Here’s to a new online journey…

Filed under: Writing, , ,

Adios 2011

New Year’s Eve always brings out the nostalgia in me. What have I done this year? Have I progressed in my writing? More importantly, have I provided for my family? Have I been a good husband? Dad? Brother? Son? Have I helped make the world a better place?

I come up with various answers, always leaning towards the positive. It is my opinion that life can only be lived by looking at the bright side of things without being naive to what I need to improve on.

There’s always room for improvement. I have a lot I want to do with my writing, but I have faith that an author’s work will be recognized at the time it was destined to. My writing goal in 2012 is to continually work on my writing and let the chips fall where they may. In truth, how other people will respond to my writing is out of my control. In 2012, I write to satisfy an inside desire to tell stories that make sense to me.

And one day, hopefully it makes sense to a few other people.

Thank you 2011 for teaching me many lessons. I hope to learn from these lessons to become a better person, primarily to focus on the moment without letting it pass me by so quickly. My kids are growing so fast that I will work on pressing the pause button. 

To all my writer friends, may your writings be heard by the world and may satisfaction come to you through your prose. To my music industry friends, take care of yourself and keep pounding out hits. To family and friends, thank you for being in my life.

I wish you all a prosperous 2012!

Filed under: Writing, , , ,